Judd Lienhard on Finding Hope After Service: A Military Operative's Journey to Healing

Join DSNSB this week as we sit down with Judd Lienhard (@always_be_an_athlete), a former US Army Ranger Platoon Leader turned strength and conditioning coach. Judd brings a powerful story of resilience and transformation that sheds light on finding hope after military service, especially for those struggling with PTSD.

In this episode, Judd shares a deeply personal experience that shifted his perspective on humanity during his time in the army. From discussions on grace, discipline, and leadership to reflections on steroid usage and the art of accepting compliments, Judd's insights offer a beacon of hope to listeners navigating their post-military journey.

As a thought leader, Judd's wisdom shines through as we delve into the deeper meaning behind his quotes. Tune in to discover the profound impact of his story and find inspiration for your own path to healing.

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Join us on DSNSB as we explore stories of hope and happiness, one inspiring guest at a time.

With Big Love & Gratitude,
David 🎙️

Transcript

Microphone (Scarlett 6i6 USB) - 1: 0:13

All right everybody. Welcome to another episode of David Saturday Night. Sit back tonight. I am very grateful and very excited to have Judd Lek with me. Is that how you pronounce your last

Microphone (Scarlett 6i6 USB) - 2: 0:24

name? Yep.

Microphone (Scarlett 6i6 USB) - 1: 0:25

Perfect. Judd Reinhard, is a strength and conditioning specialist here in Austin, Texas. He graduated from Truman State in Missouri while being voted linebacker of the year by his pierce. He then made his way to San Diego and after that, if I got my timeline correct, eventually Afghanistan, Chicago, and then made it here to Austin. During that span of time as he was moving around the world, he went from being a sports medicine trainer to an infantry offer officer, excuse me, where he was awarded his airborne wings and Ranger. He was then awarded his Bronze Star as a platoon leader, and upon exiting the military, became the fitness director for World Gym in Chicago. He is now a dad, a veteran, a coach, a writer, personally based off my research, I think he is a modern day flash. And today he's here on David's Saturday night. Sit back, Jud, thank you so much for being here.

Microphone (Scarlett 6i6 USB) - 2: 1:15

for being and My pleasure, man.

Microphone (Scarlett 6i6 USB) - 1: 1:16

So, as I summarized 25 years of your life in 30 seconds, any any particular memories, flashbacks, that sort of hit you as you, you listen to that?

Microphone (Scarlett 6i6 USB) - 2: 1:27

No, the timeline was pretty spot on. you know, just, uh, the, the memory of my time in San Diego being like kind of a young trainer, kind of realizing that I wasn't really doing because I was 2005 and the war in Iraq was not really going well. And just realizing kids my age or men my age were doing their part and I wasn't, while I was living life on the beach. And that decision to, go a different direction with my life was, you know, one of the profound. Course changing events in my life, I believe.

Microphone (Scarlett 6i6 USB) - 1: 1:54

So when you moved out to San Diego, was that for the Army or did you move out there for personal reasons and the Army happened?

Microphone (Scarlett 6i6 USB) - 2: 2:02

no, man, I, I graduated college, just loved working out in fitness and, uh, just was looking around for personal opportun personal training opportunities around the country. And, you know, I had one in Bellevue, Washington and one in San Diego. And, uh, my best friend in college was actually from San Diego, so I kind of tipped the scales in favor of San Diego and just drove out there with nothing but what I had in my Jeep and slept on a dude's couch for a couple months until I could form enough money in my bank count to rental apartment and just went from there. So there was nothing other than just wanting to live life and not thinking too much about the future at that point,

Microphone (Scarlett 6i6 USB) - 1: 2:34

Boy. Was it, to the best of your memory, was it pretty exhilarating jumping in the car with. Only what you could fit in it. Cuz I did the exact same thing for Austin. I have a little Ford focus, the dog took up the whole passenger seat. So I had the backseat and a not very big trunk to pack some clothes and a little bit more what you're, and you're smiling ear to ear.

Microphone (Scarlett 6i6 USB) - 2: 2:54

That is that, you know, spot on man. It's a sense of freedom and risk and exhilaration that, you know, people may only get to experience once or twice in their life. And just, yeah, just nothing, you know, tying me down and literally, you know, just like you, everything I owned it, fit, it, fit inside of a Jeep Wrangler, literally. And, that's probably happened twice in my life. I think it happened again post-military one time, and by the time I had a dog too. So just like you, it was me and the dog hitting the road to Austin. Yep. And with, you know, nothing behind me and everything in front of me. And it's just, it really is a sense of, freedom and adventure that is hard to find a modern day world. You know,

Microphone (Scarlett 6i6 USB) - 1: 3:27

of, yeah. Yeah.

Microphone (Scarlett 6i6 USB) - 2: 3:28

I remember driving through Utah and seeing the sunset over those cliffs in Utah and just like, you know, it's pretty exciting. Yeah.

Microphone (Scarlett 6i6 USB) - 1: 3:35

one of the parts I really liked about driving to Austin was somewhere in New Mexico. we were running low on gas and we were on top of this mountain. Couldn't tell you what mountain, but we were high up and it's just desert. And finally I see a, an exit sign and had a, a sign saying gas. So I pulled out and I, opened my door and the wind was blowing at 55 miles per hour and it just slammed it right back. I'd never been in winds that intenses before. So I opened it again, get my wind inside to pay for the gas. And I made a comment to the lady about, uh, about how fast the wind was. And she's like, you're not from

Microphone (Scarlett 6i6 USB) - 2: 4:09

country yard. Oh, that's

Microphone (Scarlett 6i6 USB) - 1: 4:10

awful. And I said, Nope. And she's like, this is nothing. Son

Microphone (Scarlett 6i6 USB) - 2: 4:13

is something similar happened. So I was driving through Utah and it said, you know, I was almost on empty and it said gas this way. And I was like, sweet. And then when I turned it said gas 30 miles. And I was like, oh my gosh. Like I'm not gonna make it. I literally almost like ran out gas in the desert at one point cuz I just wasn't used to that area. You know, I was using the gas being more available. I mean it's life lessons start, you know, with little stuff like that. You know what I.

Microphone (Scarlett 6i6 USB) - 1: 4:34

Yep. So since you and me we have that, that thing in common where we both sort of moved to an area, you had your best friend out in San Diego. I had my reasons for moving to Austin. If anyone happens to listen to this and they're thinking like, should I leave my hometown, my family? Would you have any pros, cons, regrets, something you know, any advice for? What should you do before packing your Jeep and, and heading out to the unknown? My,

Microphone (Scarlett 6i6 USB) - 2: 4:57

my universal advice for people considering a move is just to make sure that you're running towards something and not away from something. If you're leaving an area because you're not happy with your friends, your family, your job, whatever, just, just make sure it's not just cuz you're running away and make sure it's not because you're, you're hoping to find something somewhere else that you're not getting there. See an opportunity in someplace and always run towards an opportunity or an adventure because if you're just running away from something, the things you're running away from will find you wherever you go. people think that a change of scenery will totally change their life, and it, it, it takes more of a change of mindset, a change of goals, a change of character. Like I always tell kids that want to do something different or want to quit school or quit a sport. I'm like, that's fine. What are you running towards though? Yeah. Are you just running away from something that don't run away from himself? It's okay to change directions in your life, but you have to be running forward.

Microphone (Scarlett 6i6 USB) - 1: 5:53

Schooler. I was listening to the Ed Mylet show recently. You know who that

Microphone (Scarlett 6i6 USB) - 2: 5:57

to no,

Microphone (Scarlett 6i6 USB) - 1: 5:58

great podcast, motivational and business driven. And I forget who the guest was, but it was one of his most, five or six, recent guests. And one of the dropped a great quote and he said, wherever you go, there you are. So before you think I need to quit this job, I need to leave the city. I need to end this relationship. If you are not evaluating what your part isn't, You are going to show up in that next job, city and relationship, and you just wasted so much time and money and energy are three most valuable commodities to change. Nothing

Microphone (Scarlett 6i6 USB) - 2: 6:37

That's uh, that's so true, man. I mean, people are always trying to change their environment before they change themselves. You gotta change yourself first. You know, like how are you viewing things? How are you perceiving things? How are you interacting with people? And before you go blaming the people, the place that you're in. And I'm not saying that that's not relevant, you know, there are negative people, there are things that need to change, but you know, like you said, are you accepting your role in the way are Yeah, it's very important. Just accountability. Yeah.

Microphone (Scarlett 6i6 USB) - 1: 7:06

I have at least one friend who will listen to this podcast and hopefully more. he is currently 19 years old. I believe. He's debating, should I go into the military or should I not? And I think part of that journey is also Army, Navy, Marines. What direction would I go? Could you talk to us a little bit about, maybe what advice you'd give to a young person who's post-high school and deciding a, what should I do with my life, college, military, or other? And then the second part of that question is maybe why you chose the Army, specifically,

Microphone (Scarlett 6i6 USB) - 2: 7:35

question. Sure. whether you should join the military or not is, you know, it's a personal question. It's a personal decision. And I think on some level it has to be done with your eyes wide open. Knowing the risks, knowing that it's not gonna be what Hollywood portrays. I still laugh about what it was really like compared to the commercials you know, and, and if you do something and you're thinking about glory and fame or making yourself a man, that's partly the wrong motivations. If, if you enter it for service thinking, you wanna be part of something bigger, you know, feeling like you wanna serve your country, that's great. But if you think that combat or whatever he wants to do is, is gonna be something that will make him a man, I think that's kind of the wrong motivation there, because there are things that you're gonna see. Are there things that could happen to you potentially that will change the course of your life? And you need to be fully prepared for those things. I know young kids think they're invincible, but you see things over there that really open your eyes to the fact that this isn't about glory. You know, they, I think they paint the military as a, in a way that it's, you know, they glorify it and things like that. It is a form of service, but, the glory gets taken out in a hurry when you see people actually suffer, you know, live with the repercussions of things that happened over there, both mentally and physically. I don't wanna discourage anybody from doing it. It's a, it's a very admirable course, but it's not, also not the only way to serve your country, you know, I get thank you for your service all the time when people find out was in the army. But, you know, nurses serve, firefighters, serve, you know, police officers serve school. I mean, there's countless ways you can serve your country that you don't have to hold a gun.

Microphone (Scarlett 6i6 USB) - 1: 9:04

count and

Microphone (Scarlett 6i6 USB) - 2: 9:05

And there's also ways in the military that you can serve without having to hold a gun too, or fire a weapon. and it is no less, admirable than being a combat infantry guy. it's no less important. And as far as like what branch to go into, you know, I initially wanted to be a, uh, a helicopter pilot. and that the, the route to getting in was gonna take about nine months, told me, had an infantry slide open immediately. I was like, I'll take it, so I mean, it was just impatience, youthful impatience on that part. but the, I think the branch, you have to really, kind of get, you know, ask yourself what the culture of every branch is. Every branch is a different culture, where you might end up be stationed and what opportunities you're gonna have inside of that branch. And they're all very different and they all have upsides too. so it's a, it's a decision. I mean, sit down with recruiters, understand that recruiters are sales.

Microphone (Scarlett 6i6 USB) - 1: 9:50

I mean,

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they're gonna sell you something right. And it ain't gonna be the whole truth. Yep. but sit down with'em, see what they have to say. go with the one that seems like he's being, he or she is being the most honest with you. you know, I like the Marines cause I feel like they're kind of honest with kids up front a little bit, you know, and, and then they, uh, emphasize the fact that it's not all about them, that they're gonna serve and that there's a risk to it. And I just like when people are honest.

Microphone (Scarlett 6i6 USB) - 1: 10:13

I'm curious what your take on this is. I'm a recruiter for a living. I recruit accountants and whenever someone's starting a job search, even if it's a non accountant, maybe they're an engineer and they reach out to me and say, Hey, I wanna quit in the next three to six months, how do I decide what, what recruiter to work with or whatnot? And my advice that I always give to them is, is get on the phone with them. Cuz if you have a good gut, like I, I feel like I do, that's why I got into recruiting. You can probably tell within 10 to 20 minutes if this person is BSing you or if they're selling, you know, if they're a genuine person and giving you a clear cut message if, assuming that people who hear this also have a good gut, good head on their shoulders. Do you feel like that's true for military recruiters? That you can sort of Yeah,

Microphone (Scarlett 6i6 USB) - 2: 10:52

Absolutely. And it's also important to remember, like, you're not just there, they're not your authority figure at that point. They're there to serve you as much as they need you, as much as you need them. And it's a, it's a, you know, a lot of these kids are young, they get intimidated. So when the recruiter tells'em stuff, they kind of go along with it. They don't ask questions. And you know, that recruiter needs them to sign up and the recruiter has to sell you as much as you're trying to sell that recruiter. So if there's things you're not comfortable with, you know, at that point, you know, this is your time to make a better choice or, or speak to a different recruiter in a different branch. Like, you know, shop around, you know, find, if you wanna serve, find out how best you can serve. and, and. Because once you're in, you're in You know what I mean? Yep. Once you sign on that line and things change, it's like a recruiter for college, man. They're nice and sweet. They come to your home and kiss your mom on the cheek,

Microphone (Scarlett 6i6 USB) - 1: 11:37

sheet

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and you get there and it's like, this is not the same coach that was having dinner with my family two months ago. He's yelling at me and saying bad words to me. What happened?

Microphone (Scarlett 6i6 USB) - 1: 11:45

saying bad words.

Microphone (Scarlett 6i6 USB) - 2: 11:47

Yeah. He kissed, he hugged my mama and told me, told her he was, she was gonna take care of me. He's not, he's he's being mean

Microphone (Scarlett 6i6 USB) - 1: 11:54

He's being me.

Microphone (Scarlett 6i6 USB) - 2: 11:56

Yeah. Recruiter like army ain't no different man. You get in there and it's like, that recruiter was way nicer than you are. Yeah.

Microphone (Scarlett 6i6 USB) - 1: 12:02

That's funny. When you were in college, you were voted linebacker of the year. when you were in the military, you had the opportunity to lead a group of soldiers. Thinking back on your younger age, did you chase leadership positions? Do you feel like you, like it seems to be consistent as I went through, as I looked you up on LinkedIn and different websites, and I'm curious, hard work. Did you chase'em? why is it you consistently seem to be falling into these leadership

Microphone (Scarlett 6i6 USB) - 2: 12:30

theses man? 100%. Full disclosure. I think I've learned what it means to be a leader a lot over the year. I, was not really ready to be a leader when I was Larry. Looking back on it, I could have been a much better leader. I was a little young, a little late to mature, and I feel like people identified me as a leader more than identified myself as a leader. I enjoy more of the role now of being like a mentor one-on-one rather than I know what it takes to be a leader. I never really enjoyed leading. I, I much prefer serving and the reason I wasn't went to the officer route, honestly 100% full disclosures cuz it paid better. I was in my late twenties man, and I saw what privates got paid and I saw what officers got paid and I was like, well, I guess I'm gonna be an officer. Yeah. And, you know, cause you know, I can't go back to making 1300 bucks a. and looking back on it though, like I probably would've done better as a enlisted guy because they can become leaders too, and they can lead much smaller numbers of men and ha and be more impactful on a per person basis than an office. And I wasn't the best officer in the world looking back on it. You know, attention to detail, trying to make pe people happy, not understanding the importance of some of the details of my job, you know? so, you know, I learned a lot through the years and I know now that I didn't really know about leadership. So as much of in my advice, you know, when people read it, I don't want them to think that I was a perfect leader or a great leader. As much of my advice comes from me failing and seeing things in hindsight as it does from the successes I've had. I'm much am, I'm much more comfortable in more of a mentor position than a leadership position, to be quite honest

Microphone (Scarlett 6i6 USB) - 1: 14:04

Yeah, I remember when I was somewhere in my mid twenties, I'd been working at a local health club back in Sacramento for a couple years. Went from the childcare to the front desk, personal trainer, assistant manager, and then finally got my own health club. I was very excited and I made so many mistakes, so many of them, so stupid, so immature. And the only reason I succeeded was cuz I had 15 people that worked with me who were patient and knew I was young and knew I was immature And I learned, I learned two things, and I wonder if you could resonate with this, is I learned so much about myself that I never would have. Was given those opportunities to mess up. and similar to you, I also don't know that I'd ever won a position like that again. Even recently at my current company, we had some management turnover and me and one of my buddies, jumped on the phone and said, Hey, you know, we're both young in our career. They wouldn't offer it to us, but hypothetically, if Ahmad our leader, came to one of us and said, we wanna promote you up to this management spot that just opened up, would you take it? And both of us were like, absolutely no, we, because we like it, we like the independence of, we just get to hire our candidates. We get to mentor the younger recruiters. We don't have to, we just do it cuz we enjoy it. I, I would not want to lead a team of a dozen recruiters. It's, it's just not in my,

Microphone (Scarlett 6i6 USB) - 2: 15:31

throughout my training, um, my, the people evaluating me told me that when I was in a leadership position, I did well, but I was so hesitant to take that position on myself. And it's because I never, I, I just don't feel like being a leader. I, I'll do it if there's no other leadership. If I see in a situation and no one's being the leader, I'll step up and I'll try to do the best I can. But I would much prefer to be led, honestly 100% than be the leader. And I like human connections and friendships and bonding. A leader. You can't do that man. You can't be friends with the people you lead. If you really care about the people you lead, you can't be their friend. Because when you lead people, you're gonna have to a, ask them to do something at some point in time. You know, things like risk, having, putting'em in place that's gonna get them killed. Yeah. You know, or putting or firing the, the people that just aren't right for the job. So you open it. So cuz it's better for your team and if you, you know, have a heart for people, it's really hard for you to make hard decisions, especially when you bond with these people. Um, so a leader kind of part of it, you have to be aloof to some extent and you have, you also have to have a servant's heart and love them in tough ways. And some of that is instilling discipline and, you know, and, and like discipline and leadership through these like, mystical words that for some reason they're like hard for us to define, but they're not actually hard to define. Like discipline is just doing the hard little things when it's easier not to on a consistent basis. And, and creating a habit of discipline when you know something's the right thing to do. Doing it even though there's. Easier things you could do that probably at that time won't get you ied you won't get caught, or it won't make a big difference. Like that is discipline. It's easily very easily defined. Leadership is the same way. It's like in instilling purpose, direction and motivation in others. You know, it's, it's a very, you don't have to be a good person to be a leader. Very evil men all over the world that are great leaders, you know, and it's, it's a, it's, it's not a mystical thing.

Microphone (Scarlett 6i6 USB) - 1: 17:20

know? Yeah. Uh, one or two more questions about the military and then we'll, we'll move on. Um, do you have any favorite memory? Um, maybe a friend you're made, you're still, you're still in touch with any, just like a, something, something special that came out of that, even a lesson you learned and experienced. Um, anything that jumped out at you is just a, a wonderful memory that you still cherish.

Microphone (Scarlett 6i6 USB) - 2: 17:43

a, uh, there's so many, um, different types of memories, but just they were impactful my life. Uh, It's a longer story, but I'll make it as short as possible. Um, this is one of my last missions in Afghanistan. We went in and we were going after some dudes, and

Microphone (Scarlett 6i6 USB) - 1: 17:59

story

Microphone (Scarlett 6i6 USB) - 2: 18:00

uh, when we landed, they kind of went to the tree line, fled to a, a few different compounds. And, um, you know, we engaged a few of'em, killed a few of'em, and then, um, one of'em fled into a compound and we were surrounding that compound. So our rear security element, um, uh, which I was by, um, uh, somebody came, it was at nighttime. Somebody came out of the house and pointed something at my rear security element. And, you know, through the reeds, they couldn't really tell what it was. I guess they thought it was a gun. And they, they engaged them and killed them. And since I was closer to the real security, um, element, I crossed the stream with him. And when we got on the other side of the stream, it was an old man and we killed the. and, uh, oh, he was dying actually. And you know, it's Afghanistan, so it's mud brick compounds. And so it's a big courtyard and they have the homes on the inside and they had a, a tin door and the bolts went through the door and it, and it killed Doll man's wife, and it also wounded one of their children. So we went in there and secured the compound and we realized that we had killed two civilians and, and mortally wounded another one. So we were there all day with these people. Um, and you know, we, we have to pay them to make amends for the damage. I mean, it's, it's, it's the only thing we could really do.

Microphone (Scarlett 6i6 USB) - 1: 19:16

these. Yeah,

Microphone (Scarlett 6i6 USB) - 2: 19:17

And we are surrounded by, so it's extended families that live there. So there's probably 15, 20 kids and all day long we sit there and watch them mourn their dead parents that we had killed, honestly. And when it came time for lunch, it's like one or 2:00 PM the sun was high, they made themselves lunch and the little girls brought over food to us to eat and we had just killed their grandparents and they still offered us food. And to me that was just so, such a human thing to do. You know, and I, there were also times when we had insurgents there that were thirsty, and I would see, you know, we had captured'em and I would see people bend down and give them water. And it's just the little human things I saw in such a bu, a brutal, horrible place. Um, and it was regardless, it was regardless of religion or faith or what side they were on, it's still a very human touching thing where like, man, if somebody had just killed my grandparent, I don't know if I'd offer them food or not, but the, these little kids did, you know? And, uh, it, it stuck with me for a long, it haunts me, but it's also a reminder of the

Microphone (Scarlett 6i6 USB) - 1: 20:23

so, yeah.

Microphone (Scarlett 6i6 USB) - 2: 20:24

humanity. That was one story.

Microphone (Scarlett 6i6 USB) - 1: 20:25

Did the kids say anything or did they.

Microphone (Scarlett 6i6 USB) - 2: 20:28

it was in Poston or whatever language they were speaking. So I, I don't know what they said, but they did say something. It was, they just, but you could tell they were offering us. And uh, and you know, it was probably good for me because I, I got really gotta see the human side of war too. Dead people all day long is not something you

Microphone (Scarlett 6i6 USB) - 1: 20:44

Right. Thank you for that. Um, when you transitioned outta the military, that would've been around November, 2011,

Microphone (Scarlett 6i6 USB) - 2: 20:55

I think it was November,

Microphone (Scarlett 6i6 USB) - 1: 20:58

2010.

Microphone (Scarlett 6i6 USB) - 2: 20:59

Yeah. Late 2010. Go.

Microphone (Scarlett 6i6 USB) - 1: 21:02

how did you end up landing at the World Gym in Chicago? Was that immediately after or was there something in your story I missed there?

Microphone (Scarlett 6i6 USB) - 2: 21:08

Yeah, um, so I was dating a girl at the time and, uh, she was also in military, but she was transitioning out and she got a, uh, job opportunity with Gatorade and then Pepsi in Chicago. So I, when I got out, I followed her up there and, you know, I had convinced myself I could sell insurance

Microphone (Scarlett 6i6 USB) - 1: 21:25

and

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lasted like three months. And one day I'm driving to work, I'm hating life, man. Wearing a suit, sitting at a desk, talking about insurance all day. Hating life. And I pass a world gym and I just pull in there and I'd walk in and I say, Hey, you guys need a trainer. And I kids couldn't do it anymore. So I was just a personal trainer there for three months until they offered me the fitness manager role. And uh, right when I got it within a month, my girlfriend at the time decided she wanted to move back to Louisiana View family. So I was only the fitness manager there for a few months at most. But that's basically the story behind that.

Microphone (Scarlett 6i6 USB) - 1: 21:56

few months. Gotcha.

Microphone (Scarlett 6i6 USB) - 2: 21:58

One

Microphone (Scarlett 6i6 USB) - 1: 21:58

I noticed about your Instagram is that, for the most part, I think you started it in 2017. I'm, I miss where I put it down in my notes, but that's neither here nor there. You seem to be incredibly consistent in the gym, uh, I'm assuming in probably other places as of your life as well. Um, is there any particular key to consistency? What's sort of your motivation to just,

Microphone (Scarlett 6i6 USB) - 2: 22:22

uh, consistency with fitness or in general? I think,

Microphone (Scarlett 6i6 USB) - 1: 22:25

or let's stay with fitness for now? Um,

Microphone (Scarlett 6i6 USB) - 2: 22:29

I think it's, you know, people say this, but they don't really mean it. You have to prioritize it. Anything that you love, first of all, you have to love it, you know? Um, and if you don't love it, now you have to either find stuff that makes you love it or doing it a way where you'll start to love it. Um, and you have to prioritize it, which means it has to be a part of your daily schedule. And the only things that interrupt your routine are true actual emergencies and some things. And some people are gonna have to kind of fall by the wayside on occasion in order for you to get your workout in. And you're not gonna feel sorry for that because life will take every spare moment from you if you'll let it. There's always somebody that needs something or wants something or something that needs to be done. If you don't schedule it in, it's like brushing your teeth. It has to be done and, and I got it. Emergencies pop up or some warnings. I don't brush my teeth. If my kid is sick and he needs to go to the emergency room, I'm not gonna brush my teeth. I'm gonna take him to the emergency room. But if it's not an emergency, I'm gonna get my workout in and I'm gonna be flexible enough to do it. I'm gonna change times, change ways, but consi to, the key to being consistent is prioritizing and. And I don't think that's revolutionary information.

Microphone (Scarlett 6i6 USB) - 1: 23:30

No, I don't think so. And I think once you, I think the hardest part is just building the new habit, because for me it's very much the same. It's se it's second nature at this point. Yeah. So like this week, for example, I know on Tuesday I'm gonna lift in the morning where I normally lift at night. But because it's habitual, it's pretty easy to say, I, I'm, I'm gonna be in there by seven versus

Microphone (Scarlett 6i6 USB) - 2: 23:48

I am a James Clear, you know, atomic

Microphone (Scarlett 6i6 USB) - 1: 23:51

Yes,

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the guy like foreman habits. Man. It's crucial

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One post from your Instagram page that you made in this, in the, on this subject, if there's an aspect of your life that you would like to change, don't be so hard on yourself. First of all, congratulations. The fact that you, you used the word you, when contemplating change is somewhere, most people will never get the fact that the words. Things, people and circumstances aren't in that thought, says even more than what was in that thought. You just changed, you took ownership of your own issues. Two questions in regards to that post. Why do you think it's important that we be a little bit less hard on ourselves and allow a little bit more room for some grace? Grace,

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you know, I'm Christian and I think grace is very important that we look around and people are presenting the best sides themselves, especially with social media. We see performers and people that are, you know, excel in things and we feel like they're flawless cuz they don't highlight their flaws, they don't highlight their failures. We don't talk about our failures enough and I just feel like we all struggle. Um, we all fall short. Um, and I think, you know, if you're hard on yourself and the negative self-talk, I know it sounds fufu, but negative self-talk only leads to negative things and you kind of understand like, you know, don't expect too much from yourself. today Um, and every day is a new day. So if you failed today, you'll wake up tomorrow and it's a new start, a a new, fresh. And then that's why I'm big on developing habits. Just develop small habits. Always say excel in little ways so that you can learn to excel in larger ways. And, you know, not every day has to be a victory. And failing one day doesn't make you a failure. You know, there's a quote, I didn't come, I, I honestly can't remember said this, but we are what we do every day. If you want to be, if you want to be different, then be different every day. Um, so there are tons of things in my life that people look at. If they knew me that they would say, this guy needs to improve this hassle. My, I have the filthiest truck in the world, man, and I cannot

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you know, everybody's

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oh, you must be so disciplined in the gym. Well, I love the gym. I hate cleaning my truck out. And I have bat, and to this day I struggle with cleaning my truck out, man. And you know, my wife told me she knew that I wasn't out of her league the minute she saw my truck. And I'm like, yeah, I'm pretty gross. Um,

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I'm pretty gross.

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So, I mean, there's tons of stuff about me, you know, and it's, I don't like it when you look at people and you put'em on this pedestal, like nobody put anybody on pedestal now, you know? And because it's not, it's honestly not fair to that person that you're putting on a pest. I hate it when people get to me because I'm only at that point, I'm only gonna let you down.

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I heard this analogy once that if I constantly eat candy or chips all day, that I will probably see my health decline as a result. Whether it's a lack of energy, my stomach's getting bigger, it hurts to go to the bathroom. Like whatever that negative result is, it will come. And if you are constantly just feeding yourself negativity, then it's going to fester in your head as well. And so the reason you might start your day with a gratitude list is cuz you're giving yourself a window to eat the chicken. But say to, to, you know, before I start this day and I start thinking about the argument I had with my wife, the recruiter that was nice and then cursed me out and I still don't know how I'm dealing with that. take a day to, or take a moment to just think about, what am I grateful for? Or, or three that I really like to end my day with is, um, what did I learn today? Well, even if it was small, I, I learned a, a small fitness tip from you. What did I give today? Or how did today add to the quality of my

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I love that

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that. And if you start thinking about that every day, there's a part of your brain called the reticular activating system that knows. It's going to be asked right before he goes to bed, one of these three questions and you are re hardwiring the computer system of your brain to be looking for, can I learn from Judd, can I give to my neighbor? Can I add to the quality of my life by doing something else? And it will help balance out all that negative self-talk. So you're not suppressing it, you're not denying it, but you're allowing yourself a few moments to say.

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And I love how you also pointed out, it's science-based man. It's not fufu. It's not mystical. There's a part of your brain. Right. And it's a science-based chemical reaction. Like it's not some mystical thing that we can't put our hands on. It's not a force. You know, it's science. Yep. You know, and I, I love the attitude of gratitude and, and of, you know, folks like, what can I do this day to make somebody's life better? And, you know, the days where I go through and I try to make the whole day about me, you know, they never really turn out as good as I wanted'em. But when I started out a day and I focus on somebody else and doing something for somebody else, that day always seems to work out better for me. And the sense of fulfillment and joy I get from helping others, it doesn't make me a better person. This works for everybody. When you help other people, a sense of reward is far more fulfilling than anything you're ever gonna do for yourself. Um, so yeah, it's like positive thinking is, is incredibly important. Yeah. Um, and I think people just have a hard time saying nice things about themselves. I heard something just the other day, like, you know, if I'm thinking something, just take a break and look in the mirror. I think my wife shared this with me. Take a break and look in the mirror. and pretend like you are not talking to yourself, but you're giving advice to your best friend. And what would your best friend, what would you say to your best friend if that, if that person was you? I guarantee you wouldn't say the same kind of negative stuff you're saying to yourself. Right. You know? Um, and I think that's great advice. Like, we can't be so hard on ourselves.

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Yeah, someone said something similar, to me once and said, if a stranger came up and started talking to you, like you talked to yourself, would you not kick that guy's ass's or at least attempt to, even if he's big or stronger, faster, whatever, you'd still try to take him out just cause it'd be so infuriating. You'd be like, who the hell are you's

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horrible how we talk to ourselves. Right know. And it leaks out every once in a while. I mean, it's, it's incredibly important for, you know, it is a story from Ranger of school. Man, it's funny. It's like, um, if, if I list listed out all the things that we had to do in ranger school, you would think it was. But that being said, there is never a time in ranger school that is so daunting. You can't get through that one moment. There is nothing superhuman about Ranger school, but if you list it all out the miles you'll walk, the amount of sleep you'll get, the amount of weight you'll lose, the the illnesses you'll have. You're like, no one can do that. But people do it all the time. Normal people that don't seem like tough guys. Normal guys do all the time. And I learned a valuable lesson going through Ranger school and I saw people quit when we were literally doing nothing. So we had walked all day, whatever, but we're literally sitting down with our boots off. There's a nice breeze. We're eating our only meal today. And instead of just enjoying the moment, the guy sat there and starts talking about everything we have to do the next day and the day after. He's talking about how far we're gonna have to walk, how we're not gonna yay sleep, how he's worried about his leadership patrol coming up where you get graded on. And I'm looking at him, I'm like, just eat your meal, man, And sometimes it's good not to think. And like just eat your meal. When they say get up, get up. When they say walk, you walk. When they say lead, you lead. Until then you do you. And don't think just, just be, you know? And sometimes we think too much and we, we, our mind always wants comfort. So it's always piling things on in our brain to convince us it's impossible and we should quit because if we quit, then there'll be comfort. And so we have to defeat our lying mind. No man can walk a hundred miles, no man with 40 pounds, but every man can walk to the top of the next hill, just walk to the top of the next hill. And then when you get there, walk to the top of the one after that. Like this whole elephant, one bite at a time thing. And that guy quit like two days later And like I knew he was gonna quit. And I'm like, dude, in your mind you made. So these kids that are like, I hear'em when they come in and train with me and they're dreading two days. They're like, tomorrow we gotta get up. And I was like, yeah, you do, but right now you don't. So when the alarm goes off, just get up and just eat breakfast and just drive because none of that sucks. And when you get there and warm up, cuz that doesn't suck. And when it sucks, it sucks. But it, but your Socrates said, I think it was, Socrates said something about this, like, thinking about our problems just makes'em worse. Yeah. Just if you know you're gonna do it and you dread it, you're dreading, you're, you're creating misery when there shouldn't be any misery in that moment, you know, just when it happens, happens and get through it and then you've gotten through it. So sometimes thinking less does more. Yeah. So

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I have a buddy who, um, I actually have several friends that are an Alcoholics Anonymous and one of them was telling me that they have the saying take it one day at a time. But for him he sometimes takes it as small as 10 minutes at a time. You know, the alarm went to your point, the alarm goes off, okay, I'm gonna get outta bed, I'm gonna eat my breakfast. You know, I can't, I can't even start to comprehend. I'm not gonna drink for 10 years. Cuz if he does that, he's setting himself up for

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barrier. Yes.

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Yes. He can't even think, I'm not gonna drink for a month. It's okay. It's 8:00 AM it's Tuesday. What do I need to get done in the first half of my day? What's the first four hours between now and my lunch gonna

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And every day's a victory, man, when you, every day you don't drink is a victory that you can notch under your belt. You know what I mean? Like give yourself credit for your victories too.

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victory. Yep.

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You know that, that, that's the truest thing, I think is just one day at a time. And we say it so much that it's cliche, but it's a very true thing. One moment at a

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time, I think if you try to live. It starts to become more real and tangible and less of a, a cliche, but going back to, to the quote, about there's an aspect of your life that you'd like to change. you were talking about, just get to the top of this, the next hill, let's say there's someone who's listening to this, that they don't do a lot for their own health and they're thinking to themselves, I want to be stronger. I want to lose weight. My partner told me to be healthier. My doctor, my child, my parent. And for you and me, as we alluded to a few minutes ago now, we've been working out for so long, it's second nature. And I personally forget that some people have not seen the inside of the gym in a while. Some people, it's like, where do I even start? Is it yoga? Is it Zumba? Mm-hmm. Do I go to the dumbbells? I had one buddy who I took to the gym and we started walking to the dumbbell section. He grabbed my forearm and he's like, why are we going over there? Yeah. And I said, cuz that's where we're gonna work out. And he said, but that's where all the strong people go. and I said, no, that's just, that's where you come with me. So what if, what advice, um, would you give to someone who knows I need to start something? What's step one?

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So step one is to. You need. First of all, it needs to be an intrinsic motivation and not extrinsic. Your wife, your doctor, your friends, your girlfriend, whoever can tell you you need to do something until they're blue in the face. You could want to look a certain way for other people all your whole life. You will never succeed until you are unhappy with yourself in your own skin, in your own body, or you want to change. So other people wanting you to change how other people perceive you is never gonna be as strong a motivation. So it has to come from within. After that, you have to identify is what you want to become. It's very important. So if you're a fat guy, then you're not a fat guy anymore. You're a fit guy stuck in a fat body, and you start need to start identifying as a fit guy and feel like you're So, if I were to be fat tomorrow, gain a hundred pounds of fat, I wouldn't be a fat. guy I'd be a fit guy that had fat on me and I, since I didn't identify as that, it would be easy for me to change. The next step is habits. The, the type of exercise you do, honestly is not all that important at first. So I would do one. Something that you can do that doesn't challenge you too much to form a habit. If you want to get in crazy good shape, do something you're comfortable with that isn't gonna hurt you or be super uncomfortable, go for hikes, go for a walk, because the exercise itself is not the important part. It's the habit. Yes, there's not one great workout. Even a year's worth of fantastic workout is not gonna change you long term is the habit and the identity. Identifying as a fit person, creating habits that a fit person would have. So I always tell people at first, if you don't like those weights, don't lift weights. Do something that you like to do. Find something you like to do and do it. There's no perfect workout, so I hate it when these guys get on social media. if you don't, unless you do hit cardio, it's a waste of time. Or unless you lift weights, you're not really fit. And it's like, that's such bs. So it's just alienating. But all these people are like, I don't like doing, I don't like to sprint. What if you're a 60 year old, you know, man with knee problems and you're, and this guy's telling you if you're not sprinting, it's a waste of time. Like, it's just so negative and exclusive. And it's like hike first and develop the habit to hike and then build slowly on that habit. And one day, you know, after you feel comfortable hiking and then eventually running, and then eventually doing some body weight exercises, then one day you might feel comfortable picking up a dumbbell. But if you don't pick up a dumbbell in your entire life, it's not like you can't be a fit person, you know? Um, so these people that act like unless you're lifting weights with a barbell, you're never gonna be in shape, are just completely missing the point. Um, I love to lift weights, but I'm never gonna tell a person they have to lift weights. Yeah. You know, I, I do want them to try it eventually, you know what I mean? So when somebody comes in the first time, my job is a trainer isn't to crush their. Still build them up is to, it's to leave them when they walk out of there. Now they're gonna be sore and I don't want'em to be sore, but you know, there's gonna be soreness. Yep. But my goal is to get them to walk out of there feeling like they just beat something, feeling accomplished and like they beat the workout, like the workout did. It beat them. And I prepare'em was like, you're gonna be sore, but it's gonna be temporary and the soreness will go away and it won't happen. You know, like I don't get pride off of making people very sore. Any idiot can make somebody sore

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Right. I could do that

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Yeah. It's like, you know, if, if I just want to get you gas and pass out, if you do burpees for an hour, that doesn't make me a good trainer. You know, like being a good trainer, you have to like g like connect with people, first of all. And you don't have to be a team with them. You can't just tell them what to do. So that's my advice, I guess. Identifies what you wanna be, create the habit.

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part of the reason I was excited to move to Austin is because as I talked to people local to here, they said that people are very friendly. It's very, it's easier to make connections in Sacramento. I found that to be hard. I found it hard to build a inner, a strong inner circle of friends that I connected with. For you, this is a little bit different than forming friendships, but if you have someone that walks into the gym and they wanna hire you and they wanna work with you, how do you, how do you form that connection? Do you have a, do you take it case by case as you meet each person? Or do you feel like you subconsciously have a process you sort of go through?

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That's a good question. Um, first of all, I think demeanor with a person, um, you know, I'm naturally a bigger dude so people can, can be intimidated by me. Um, so I have to offset that with, make sure I smile, make sure I sit or stand sideways. Don't stand over them. Don't put'em in a position where they physically feel intimidated or inferior. Um, and then ask'em a question and actually listen. To what they have to say. And don't start out by telling them things, just listen to them. You know? Um, there's this thing, like the interrogator sometimes they'll talk to a person for an hour and they won't say a thing about themselves. They'll just listen to that person. And that person will walk away feeling like they're closer to and know more about that interrogator than anybody else in their life. And that interrogator, interrogator never divulges one ounce of information about themselves. People like to be listened to. So the first thing I do is I listen to people, you know, and just understand and then find things that I can relate to them. You have to be relatable. You know, they see, you know, independent on where you're at. You see the world through different lenss. They probably see a big, muscular, tough, scary guy, which is not, I'm not tough and I'm not scary, you know, and I want them to see me as closer to what they are. Even though at first appearance, I might not be, you know what I mean? I'm not something that's unattainable. I'm not something alien. You know, I'm, I'm a lot more like them than they think I am. And that applies not just to fitness, but across, you know, politics, everything else. It's just, you know, there's a book called The Righteous Mind and they talk about the elephant and the rider, and you can talk to somebody all you want, but until your elephants connect and until you connect'em on an emotional level and form a bond with that person, they're not gonna listen to you. So the first thing you have to do is form a bond. And you form a bond by understanding people and relating to them at where they're at right

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Connect. I remember when I was a personal trainer for about a year, some of those sessions, I almost felt like I was 50% therapist. Not even therapists, that's the wrong word.

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world most poorly paid therapist. Person. Listener. Oh yeah.

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know, you could, you could greet them. Walk them into the gym and start the workout and almost just shut up for the next exactly. 55 minutes. I don't need to say, I would just sort of direct them from workout to workout. If they were doing something wrong, I'd cue'em to fix this real

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That's exactly how it is, man. it gets to a point after years of training somebody, well, you'll set the exercise up and won't say a word of what you're doing. They know what you're gonna do, and they just continue on with whatever conversation they were having, you know, and that's important for people too. It it's not just the worker. It's important that somebody has somebody to talk to that's not gonna judge them. I mean, that's what therapists do basically. They listen and don't, they don't judge. Right. They're not supposed to

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supposed to. Right.

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I, it's hard to find people that will listen and not judge that'll actually listen to you and not judge you. That's very hard.

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Yeah.

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Yeah.

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you graduated in 2004.

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Does

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that sound right? Yeah.

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Uh, I believe maybe it's 2002. Bad memory. I think it was 2004. Yeah, maybe it was. Yeah. 2004. Yep. I'm

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I'm trying to look in my notes and, I think, yeah, according to your li uh, your LinkedIn, excuse me, it was 2004. That's right. So now we're in, in 2023. I'm assuming that in those 19 years you have expanded your knowledge. You did not stop learning. I hope the, the second you, yeah. You grabbed that diploma over the last year or two. would you be open to sharing where you go when you want to learn about something fitness related, you wanna upgrade your, your knowledge of, of the, you know, health and fitness? Where, where do you go?

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Good question, man. Here's a, here's a funny thing. As as people, they scoff at social media. Okay. Um, there are creators on social media that put out very good content. You have to know where to find'em. And they think if you didn't get your stuff directly out of a journal, then you're unprofessional. Honestly, most of my stuff is I follow the right people on social media. I follow doctors and people doing studies, and I read what they have to say and, and elite level sprint coaches. And I watch what they do and I listen to what they say because it's the most accessible form of information today. So a lot of my stuff is Instagram and TikTok and stuff, you know, that people put out good stuff and then maybe they'll say something that gets me curious and then I'll delve into that a little further. Read the actual study. You know, look up the study. But some of these, you know, obtuse academic journals and stuff, it's not, it doesn't always have the return on the dollar to, you know, yeah. Get them read through it. A lot of it's not applicable to what I'm doing today. Um, so I have to be kind of be interested in guided to individual article before I'm gonna do

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I hope that with every episode people have one to three maybe more things that they can take to the bank right away without spending a lot of money, time, or energy. Would it be safe to say if someone went to your Instagram page and then went to who you followed, most of the people that you follow, would there be some good?

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it'd be eclectic. I'll tell you.

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that They might judge

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me a little bit.

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Is there any one, instead of doing that, is there any one or two people or accounts you

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Oh man, I wish I was, would like to recommend, I wish I was better prepared to answer this.

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was. It's okay if you're not, don't mean to put you on the spot.

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Yeah. I mean, um, um, Squat University.

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I, I was thinking about

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knees over toes guys is great. You know, those are the most popular, this guy called Sprint Coach that I follow. Uh, basically anybody that isn't negative, I don't like it when coaches get on there and all they do is rag on other people, you know what I mean? Because half the time people are rag on it is people I like for different reasons, you know, and everybody has a different take on things and there isn't one right way to do things. So if a guy is positive and uplifting, then I tend to, you know, I brought, I follow Brett Contreras, you know, he gets a little negative sometimes, but he's got great, he's a Glu guy. He's got great information too, and he does his own studies and he is heavy on the research. And, um, I, I wish I was more prepared with names cuz there is a long list of names that I follow.

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I think it's surprising to me how many of my friends I assumed followed Squat University or at least heard of it and they didn't. So even if, even if it's just, that's a great

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he's a positive guy

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too. I, and he's, he's easy, he's easy to listen to. He's interesting to watch. And what I like about him is he breaks down things where any human could understand. You're not gonna watch that video and be like, what, what did he just say? You know?

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a very positive guy and a very, uh, he dumbs it down to where we can all understand. Yeah.

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positive. Uh, would you say that your specialty today is speed training?

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today Yes.

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How did, how the hell just that obsession come about?

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You know what's funny cuz um, of course, you know, in your early to mid twenties you think you know everything. And I got to Austin and he told me, you know, I was gonna be a speed trainer. And I was like, all right, well I already know about speed cuz I have a degree, you know? Yeah. And I got here and I quickly realized how little I knew about speed and how few trainers and coaches know about speed and how much there is to learn about it. And not just learn about the basics of how it works, but how to teach it. So I learned the physics and mechanics fair fairly quickly, but learning how to teach it took, and it's still, I'm still a work in progress, man taking. Trial and error. And it's a, it's a, so it, it, a lot of it came through watching and starting to pay attention to elite level sprint coaches and how they taught it and their concepts on it. And just trial and error and practice teaching it. You know, we do a lot of slow speed film so you can see what's happening and we can measure force output and power outputs so you can actually see, you know, obviously timing. So you can see if what you're teaching a kid is actually working, you know, on a frame by frame basis. You get instant feedback and it just creates a big, um, big toolkit that you can pull from. Cause everybody needs to be taught differently. And one thing I'll do, like, like I said, training is a partnership. So when a kid does something right, you know, and rather than just assume it's because, oh, I told him what to do, I'm like, what were you thinking when you did that? And sometimes they say something that isn't anything like I told them to do, but you know what, it worked and so then I can use that. You know, like, um, so it's like I'm never gonna tell a kid who I needed to think, I wanna see the result. and if you need to think something crazy to get that result, then you think whatever you need to think. You know,

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Yes.

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And you know, a big thing with coaching and especially speed is that a lot of it, man, we want to be scientific and do this intrinsic queuing. So you know, you need to like cycle your leg and maintain door selection and a neutral pelvis, blah, blah, blah. You need to, kids do better. People do better when you give them a task to accomplish and have them visualize something and you dumb it down. It doesn't have to be scientific to

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You made a post in February of 22, don't just assume it was the cue you gave them. Ask them what they thought about to elicit that result. This is potentially gonna be on the same note. could be completely different. I heard a Q3 or four months ago that I'm falling in love with and it simply lists Verti go.

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lifts

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it were any easier, would it be worth it?

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And

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and I think about that when I want to give up on my leg day. I think about that when I'm trying to do 20 minutes in the sauna. I think about that when it's 1:00 AM and for some reason, apple Podcasts is not letting me publish onto their feed. If this were, there's something, there's something magical. Magical is the wrong word. When you overcome a difficult situation, I feel so good when I get outta that sauna and I hit that 20 minute mark. Not only do I physically feel good, my body just feels refreshed. I can't talk about the science of what a sauna does for you. I just know I get out and I feel good. But there's something else about when I'm baking and it's those zest three or four minutes, I'm just like, oh my God, I want to get outta here. Um, what do you think about that cue? If this were any easier, would it be

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Oh, I love it, man. I love it. Um, you know, there is a qu qualitative difference to slow growth and slow success and that, you know, there are shortcuts to take. Um, you know, steroids are the biggest one. So like when a young guy starts lifting weights and with the first three or four months of lifting weights, he's is on a cyclist, cyclo steroids, he will get big and muscular, you know, but you can tell not just from a, a aesthetic viewpoint, the difference between somebody like that, that had rapid growth and somebody that's been grinding for years, whether that now they're on steroids or not. If they started out grinding for years, they have a different perception, appreciation, and quality about them. It has helped to grow them as a human being. They understand the importance of suffering and work and attention to detail, and it has changed who they are. Body building and weightlifting has served that purpose, that person. But it hasn't necessarily served the other person that took the shortcuts. When things happen quickly, they just lose this, you know, quality about them. You know, like it's fruit grows too fast, it just doesn't look the same man. It's just weird, you know? Like, yeah. You know, um, I'm not even gonna call it cheating. It's just you miss out on some of the greatest benefits of health and fitness when you try to go the easy route with whatever you do, you know? Yeah. It's the, the long, slow, steady, it's worth it. Um, but yeah, it shouldn't be easy. I hate you when stuff is easy.

Microphone (Scarlett 6i6 USB) - 1: 49:38

To that point, uh, to the best of your memory, how old were you when you started working out?

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out? I was probably 15.

Microphone (Scarlett 6i6 USB) - 1: 49:44

15. And how old are you now?

Microphone (Scarlett 6i6 USB) - 2: 49:45

43.

Microphone (Scarlett 6i6 USB) - 1: 49:46

So this was a fast math, 28 years. Yes.

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To get two people. How do you get your legs so big? I've been, yeah. Working

Microphone (Scarlett 6i6 USB) - 1: 49:52

this was not a 10 minute process. This was 28 years of creating habits, carving out time, learning new things, and to, and, and we were, let's, you know, jump into this now, even outside the gym, would you give one or two tips, um, life hacks about what's, what's, you know, something that you really enjoy doing outside of the gym that you'll. Contributes greatly to your physical and mental health.

Microphone (Scarlett 6i6 USB) - 2: 50:22

great reading. Reading is is extremely important to my mental health and praying. I'm a Christian and when I don't pray, I feel disconnected. So reading and praying are too very important. Spending time with my dog, spending time with myself when I get my own head. I hate being busy. I hate having too much noise in my head. Sometimes on my car rides, I just turn off all the, the, the music and I just enjoy the quiet and time to think it's important. We can't always be entertained and stimulated. We have to have boredom. We have to have quiet, we have to have time in our own head. Yeah. You know, with whatever you do with that, that's up to you. But, you know, we have to quiet our lives on occasion. It's just really, um, You know, like the slow, like, you know, I told my wife the other day like, I dunno, we're talking about something random. And I was like, you know, I don't think I had shoulder surgery once and I had to go eight weeks without lifting weights. And other than that, I don't think I've gone more than a week without doing some form of weightlifting or exercise in my entire life. Um, you know, even in Iraq, like we had a jail cell for a while that we took over and it was like a, a makeshift bench and a pull-up bar in there, you know, and it's, you have to do things, you have to get used to doing things. You're dedicated even when it's not really convenient, you know what I mean? And that, that's part of the habit and the consistency. There's always a way you have to be creative, you have to be flexible, but you can't just, you can't just say, well, it's too hard. I give up. And, uh, so there's people like, oh, you have good genetics. And it's like, that's true. First of all, I'm not disciplined. I do it cause I love it, but it's not genetics, man. It's, I've been working out for 30 years, like literally 10,000 workouts.

Microphone (Scarlett 6i6 USB) - 1: 51:58

Right. You

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Two 10,000 workouts, then come back and talk to me. I'm not doing something special with my workouts. I'm not, there's not a special technique. There's not a special supplement. It's consistency. Yeah. People don't like to hear that though. The reward and

Microphone (Scarlett 6i6 USB) - 1: 52:12

This is right.

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consistency.

Microphone (Scarlett 6i6 USB) - 1: 52:14

thing I've started doing lately that I've really been enjoying, we were talking about this a little bit before we turn the mics on, is, uh, when I take my dog for his morning walk, it's about 30 to 35 minutes. And, um, I have been leaving my phone at home. I grab my keys, I grab a couple of poop bags, and I grab the dog and we head out and we, you know, we go out into the street. But then we're really blessed to have, um, about 26 miles of hiking trails that are within five to 10 minutes. So we head out into those hiking trails every morning and it's, it's funny, I'm finding a new meaning of peace in my own life by just getting away from the notifications. The, and I'm not, I'm not saying technology is bad or anything like that, it's just a very special 40 minutes where it's just me and the dog. Poops

Microphone (Scarlett 6i6 USB) - 2: 53:07

me. Yeah.

Microphone (Scarlett 6i6 USB) - 1: 53:08

you know, I love it. It, I've been doing it for about, uh, since I showed up in Austin. I started it here. Um, and, and it's just, it's a really special part of my morning

Microphone (Scarlett 6i6 USB) - 2: 53:16

morning. I mean, people that succeed, they find times, they find a way to cre tie it quiet time for them to think, can't do anything when, when your life is flooded with distraction. Have to create space for yourself. Like I, I I'm a Christian, so, you know, when Jesus came even he had to get away from people on occasion. He had to go over the mountain and pray. Yeah. You know what I mean? Even Jesus had to say, Hey, I need, I need some space You know? So if you feel guilty, if you're a Christian and you feel guilty about creating space for yourself, well, Jesus didn't. Yeah. You know, he created space for himself too. Yeah. Um, so don't feel guilty about saying, Hey guys, I've dedicated nine hours to you. I need an hour or two myself. But then don't fill that hour with watching TV or getting on your phone. Exactly. It has to do something in your, with you and your own brain thinking about things. That's when the magic happens. You know? It's when you're bored or when you're alone. Yeah.

Microphone (Scarlett 6i6 USB) - 1: 54:03

A question for you about your workouts. On Instagram, they look pretty intense. I got tired just watching them As a father, as a writer, you have a job In a perfect world, if time allowed. Do you have any rituals that you would do before heading into the gym or warming up for that workout before you get into the, the bulk of your lift that day?

Microphone (Scarlett 6i6 USB) - 2: 54:25

Good question. Um, I'm a visualization guy, so I like to visualize my workout ahead of time, visualize how I'm gonna feel, what I'm gonna do in that gym, just to go through it step by step in my head that kind of gets me in tune and thinking about what I'm gonna do. Most people get hurt and when they're distracted or they're not focused on what they're doing, you know, um, tissue prep is incredibly, I. It's not just stretching, it's not just warming up with a lighter weight. It's focusing on the movements you're gonna do and being very deliberate as you move through those movements. It has to be, intensity is not going in the gym. Screaming and throwing intensity is just focus. It's like how focused are you when you're, and and I think that's a very key. So when you get in there, you have to start to focus before you get there. And then you have to be focused from your very first set. Fight for that focus too. There's gonna be distractions. I think that's one of the keys to sus is focus on

Microphone (Scarlett 6i6 USB) - 1: 55:30

get in, uh, in terms of a literal pre-workout, do you take anything or do you I

Microphone (Scarlett 6i6 USB) - 2: 55:35

have in the past. Um, right now I'm taking it, actually, I'm taking a non, not consistency. It's not, it's not honestly that important. you know, um, I'm taking a non stimulant pre-workout. I can't remember the, the name of it, but it's just a vasodilator with a little bit of creatine in there. And I feel like it does help a little bit. Um, and I've taken all kinds of pre-workouts in the past. A lot of'em, man, they get my heart rate too high. And I've, you know, um, you know, I've tried to kind of cut back on my caffeine and intake a little bit. I'll have a cup of coffee in the morning and maybe a monster mid-afternoon or something if I'm really struggling or another coffee. But, you know, I try to keep it under 500 milligrams a day just cuz you know, I, I don't want to interfere with my parasympathetic system too. Um, I just feel like people, they kind of, there's a pyramid of fitness and I feel like they get it upside down every time. They always ask me when I'm on what I take, what, um, specialized, uh, exercises I'm doing, and then they comment on how intense I am. So they just got that pyramid backwards. Look, the bottom of the pyramid is safety. Nobody ever asked me, like, you asked me, what do I do to prepare for my workouts or what do I do to ensure that my workouts no, they never ask me. That's the bottom of the pyramid. Can't work out when you're hurt. Yeah. You know, or, or at the very least, your workouts are severely altered. Second, like we talked about is consistency. So we already talked about the two bases of the pyramid. You know, you didn't start out this interview by asking me about what I took. Right. Most people in gym do they, they wanna know what I take, you know? And then after, after that, it's um, you have to be, um, after consistency then comes inten intensity. You know what I mean? But you can have the most intense workout in the world, but if you're not consistent with it, it's not, I see people all the time in there that are doing suboptimal workouts, but they're consistent and they look pretty darn. They could probably be doing something better with their time. But they're in there every day and they look pretty good. Yeah. And I see people in the day and now they kill it and then they miss, they don't work out for three weeks Then it's like, you know, so like, you know, or they, they're, they see me doing something Half the time I'm doing something cuz I'm working around an injury. But it's an exercise they haven't seen before or it's a variation. They're like, what are you doing that for? Like, it's gonna activate some kind of magical fiber. You know? I'm like, I'm doing it cause I have to, cause my rotator cuff is torn. You know what I mean? I'm not just do normal lifts, man, Yep. You know, like, so they always, they're always curious about the shortcut. They just get the pyramid upside down. So I'm not saying supplements aren't important, but they're all the things that are the very least important. Right. You know, even steroids, they're the least important part of what you can do. Hmm. You know what I mean? So I'm not against steroids, but man, if you're gonna base your fitness around steroids, you're doomed from the start, brother. Yeah. You know what I mean? I, I know all kinds of dudes that take steroids and they look horrible.

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I remember one of my friends, it was a decade ago probably, but he, uh, told me he was gonna go on a cycle. And I remember, I, I didn't run into him for whatever reason, for a couple weeks, maybe a couple months. And the way he blew up, I remember just thinking, I don't think that's what you intended, You know, so

Microphone (Scarlett 6i6 USB) - 2: 58:32

people think it's gonna change. Here's, people think that getting big and strong is gonna change their life. They think that girls are gonna love him. They think the world is gonna fall in the place. If I just was more muscular, yeah. People would respect me. If you go into it for that, based on trying to get bigger and muscular for how the world will see you, it's not the right motivation. And you're gonna be severely disappointed. If you get bigger, muscular, you're gonna get a lot of attention, but it ain't gonna be from ladies, you know, it ain't gonna be who you think is gonna be right. You know? Um, so you have to like, what's your motivation, man? You know? Um, and how patient are you to get there? Like the, I don't always work out in the most effective way, but it's the way that gives me the most.

Microphone (Scarlett 6i6 USB) - 1: 59:10

most

Microphone (Scarlett 6i6 USB) - 2: 59:11

most effective way as far as like gains go. Yeah. But sometimes I need to experience a little pain in the gym. A little discomfort is kind of a cathartic means, you know, like, um, so, you know, people have to find, they have to work out in a way that's gonna give them a reward just from working out. The process itself has to be rewarding. You can't always be goal oriented. You have to love the process. Um, and I feel like some guys, they just want to get in there and get whatever war they perceive from having big muscles or shredded abs. They feel like the world will change for them and they won't. Nobody cares about your abs man. They just don't Yeah. You're not gonna walk into a room, be in a big muscular light. You're gonna get into a lot of negative connotations. A lot of people are gonna assume a lot of things about you. That you're a meathead, that you're not smart, that you're aggressive, that you're violent, that you're simple. Yeah. Um, that you're cocky, they're gonna assume a lot of negative things. Um, so you're gonna have to then overcome those negative assumptions. People, it's not gonna change your life for the better, right. It has to be, the reward has to be from the inside.

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the better. Yeah. Someone who started working out when I was 18, I was that guy.

Microphone (Scarlett 6i6 USB) - 2: 1:00:13

Oh, me too.

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And it only in my twenties, it only made me, it only made me hate myself more because there was some other things also going on. It wasn't just my self image, but I, I would be completely lying to you if I said I started to put on weight. I started to get more muscular. I thought I would get more attention. It didn't come. And then I hated myself and, and you know, so everything

Microphone (Scarlett 6i6 USB) - 2: 1:00:41

we're

Microphone (Scarlett 6i6 USB) - 1: 1:00:41

man, I was,

Microphone (Scarlett 6i6 USB) - 2: 1:00:42

was, I'm no different, you know, and you do feel more confident if you walk around a more muscular body. There's nothing wrong with feeling more confident in yourself. There's nothing wrong with that. Um, you know, I always say like, I don't want to be too stereotypical and, and divide the genders because it's more complicated. But usually the men I see are trying to get big out of a sort sense of insecurity. And the women I see that are working out, it's a sense of control that they.

Microphone (Scarlett 6i6 USB) - 1: 1:01:04

That are, they

Microphone (Scarlett 6i6 USB) - 2: 1:01:05

they don't have control in their life. In some aspect, it's an area of their, the life that they can control. With men, a lot of times it's more so based on the form of insecurity and really they're really wanting to be validated cause they don't feel that validation. It's sad. I mean, gems are filled with sick people sometimes. I love'em. I love gym people. I love'em. I do too. And I relate to'em.

Microphone (Scarlett 6i6 USB) - 1: 1:01:28

It's a great place to be.

Microphone (Scarlett 6i6 USB) - 2: 1:01:29

It's, it's a much less intimidating and a much more comforting, accepting place than people could even imagine. They, people think of gems as these closed off societies as not it's, it couldn't be further from the truth. People from all walks of life run there. They're very accepting and very accommodating, very gracious for the most part. Yeah. Get some characters, you get some weirdos and I love it. That's life, right? Yeah. But people, there's a lot of sick people in the gym. Not just physically, but also mentally and emotionally. They go there as a form of release or therapy seeking something.

Microphone (Scarlett 6i6 USB) - 1: 1:01:55

I have a funny story for you. So have you been in, a locker room where they put those, rubber mats on the ground with the tiny holes in'em, so people don't slip.

Microphone (Scarlett 6i6 USB) - 2: 1:02:02

So yeah,

Microphone (Scarlett 6i6 USB) - 1: 1:02:02

I went to a gym I'd been working out at, since I was like 20. This was right before I came to Texas and I was talking with the current manager, about members. And we were just swapping stories As I, as I was departing California. And I said, Hey, I saw this one member in here, Jane Smith, she still goes here. Is she still up to her old tricks of causing trouble and whatnot? And the manager was like, yeah, you wanna know the, the most recent thing she did? I said, yes, please tell me.

Microphone (Scarlett 6i6 USB) - 2: 1:02:27

I

Microphone (Scarlett 6i6 USB) - 1: 1:02:27

got these new mats cuz the old ones were getting moldy to a point where even when we cleaned them, you couldn't get the stench off of'em. And so the old ones were tan and the new ones are, are close to like this dark brown color. And she hated the color so much. She went to like a Lowe's or Home Depot and uh, bought a couple master locks, went back to the gym, rolled up all of the mats, put them in various lockers, and then locked them

Microphone (Scarlett 6i6 USB) - 2: 1:02:49

That's amazing.

Microphone (Scarlett 6i6 USB) - 1: 1:02:51

That's, that's so much

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effort. Oh, people, some people times people are just driven to, lengths and so much effort outta negativity. I'm like, wow. Imagine she put all that effort into something positive, right? It's funny though. I mean, it is funny,

Microphone (Scarlett 6i6 USB) - 1: 1:03:07

Look, I would never think to,

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that's

Microphone (Scarlett 6i6 USB) - 1: 1:03:10

a lot of time. Damn. This gym for changing the color of the shower mats, I'm

Microphone (Scarlett 6i6 USB) - 2: 1:03:14

seeing how much effort that would be to do it by yourself, you know, to accomplice

Microphone (Scarlett 6i6 USB) - 1: 1:03:17

and, and those, that, that gym there is probably. You know, 10 to 12 of these mats, they, they roll out to about 12 to 14 feet. She would've had to been in there rolling and stacking and locking and for a good 20, 30 minutes.

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I always see people, they spend so much time and energy either trying to get back at people or get over on people or spend time and mental energy mad at people. I'm like, it's just think about yourself, man. Like, you know, like there's a saying, like anger is a fire that only burns down the house. It was started in. So like somebody cuts you off and you're angry at'em. Like they, they're not doing anything to that person. You're just being angry. Yep. Like I just am always blown away by how much time people spend just being angry. So the mats are the wrong color. Okay. Like what? Not on earth.

Microphone (Scarlett 6i6 USB) - 1: 1:04:05

Okay, one, I only have one specific workout on your Instagram that I really wanted to ask you about because I was working at a gym through when I graduated college. So I was primarily standing, graduated with my degree in accounting and worked for an accounting firm where during tax season we're working 70 plus hours a week. So I went from standing 80% of my day to sitting 80% of my day. And then the three years that I worked for that accounting firm, I think this is where it happened, my low back started to get a significant amount of pain. So I realize that one thing I've always ignored is low back extensions and any type of core workout. So now I'm pretty good at doing the most days per week, but there's not a lot of low back workout variations that I've seen until I was going through your Instagram and you had one where you had one leg up and sort of turned a little bit. Do you know which, which workout? I'm talking about

Microphone (Scarlett 6i6 USB) - 2: 1:04:56

make it like a single leg extension where it's figure four essentially. Oh yeah, yeah, yeah. So in, in that case, the reason, um, I have my leg propped out like that is to create a little bit more stability while I'm doing the extension and also put my hips in a more comfortable position to extend with. So it's, it, it's a little bit of a personal variation there. Okay. But that's also related to B stance. And, and have you ever, are you familiar with the term B stance? I'm not, no. So B stance is when you do a single leg version of something, but you open up the hip of the non-working leg. Um, and what it does, it opens up your pelvis and it, it kind of puts you in a more comfortable position to do the, the work and a little bit less stress on your lower back actually. Um, so, you know, sitting, I, I love those single leg extensions by the way. Um, I'm gonna try it. Yeah. Anything that's unloaded on your spine like that is great too. Um, so, you know, sitting is like so bad for us. You know, um, you know, we have to deactivate our abs when we sit, um, to let our pelvis rotate posteriorly. Um, we have our hip flexors get shortened, you know, so, you know your hip flexors, they originally on the front of your leg mostly, but then they, most of'em attach to the back of your pelvis, right? So when you stand up, that pulls your pelvis forward and then your abs. And so your, think of it like this. Your hip flexors and your lower back kind of work together to create anterior pelvic tilt. Um, your abs and your glutes kind of work together to create posterior pelvic tilt. Okay? So what happens is sitting, we have to deactivate our glutes to sit, um, and we have to de deactivate our abs. And so our glutes get weak and our get weak. And so what happens is you combine that with tight hip flexors and a tight lower back because your lower back is having to work to compensate for your lack of glued activity. You get this chronic anterior postic tilt, like a, a, a pelvis that is tilted forward. Um, and that's where a lot of this lower back pain comes from. So people always emphasize stretching out your hamstrings for lower back. But a lot of it is you have to keep your hip flexors mobile, you have to really focus on hip flexor mobility and strength, but mainly mobility and glute strength. So, um, glutes are, and hamstrings too are very important for health and especially to prevent lower back injuries, you know, so we get in there and we've been sitting all day and then we go to deadlift 300 pounds and then we hurt our back. So, you know, high heels too, man. I know it's not as common anymore, but women, we wear these high heels where they're, they're in planter flexion all day, so it limits their ankle and cal mobility. Their pelvis has to tilt forward to balance their weight out, and then they sit all day on top of that. It's like the perfect storm for low back pain. And then, you know, if they have boobs, like guys don't, you know, it, it pulls them forward even more. And, you know, high heels and sitting are like horrible for us. Yeah, I'm

Microphone (Scarlett 6i6 USB) - 1: 1:07:47

trying to imagine that like if my feet were, I'm have my feet up now sitting like this for. Eight hours.

Microphone (Scarlett 6i6 USB) - 2: 1:07:55

It's just

Microphone (Scarlett 6i6 USB) - 1: 1:07:55

Hmm.

Microphone (Scarlett 6i6 USB) - 2: 1:07:57

We, we cannot avoid sitting, um, in our society, but we have to focus on stretching out our hip flexors and activating our glutes throughout the day. There's a different bunch of different ways to do that, but, um, hip flexor mobility is one of the most overlooked things in today's society. You know, I mean, uh, and with sprinting too, your hip flexors have to be strong and have to be very mobile. Yeah. So, um, I, as I've gotten older, I have to rely a lot less on deadlifting type motions and a lot more on isolating my glutes and hamstring. Most of the volume I can still deadlift very heavy, but doing it twice a week is just not gonna work for me. So you have to be more creative with your workouts. Yeah.

Microphone (Scarlett 6i6 USB) - 1: 1:08:39

Another one of your quotes that really resonated with me, Um, one secret to being happy in life is to start viewing life less as a competition and more as a cooperation even in sales. Stop viewing your job as a competition between you and other salespeople, and more as a potential cooperation between you and those who may want your services. Watch your sales increase. People can't compete with you, especially over trivial things if you keep turning towards them with cooperation in your heart. People will always look at you with either judgment or envy. If they look at you at all, offer to help them ask for their help and watch those looks go away. People aren't bad. They are scared.

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watch. Man, that was a good one. One three,

Microphone (Scarlett 6i6 USB) - 1: 1:09:21

it was a good one. It's great.

Microphone (Scarlett 6i6 USB) - 2: 1:09:23

Oh, that's good. I must have been on it then, huh?

Microphone (Scarlett 6i6 USB) - 1: 1:09:25

Um, one of the, the my favorite things that happened in the last year is that a recruiter in Canada started, I, I refer to us as the Illuminati of recruiters. There's about 133 of us all over Canada. The us I think we have a couple in south, uh, south America now and a couple in Europe. We are technically all of our competition and we have a call every Friday that lasts for 30 minutes to an hour. A lot of us have connected one-on-one. A lot of us are sharing tips. A lot of us are sharing candidates. It is one of the happiest, most bountiful parts of my week. And I'm so fortunate that somehow someone, she connected with someone who connected with someone who connected with me and said, David should be a part of this group. Yeah. How did you come to this, this life lesson? That we're not competing with each other. We should be cooperating with each other. I

Microphone (Scarlett 6i6 USB) - 2: 1:10:14

everybody sees everything as zero sum. And I, I think, uh, you know, the rising tide lifts all ships. It's not always you against the world or you against other people. Uh, I, I think part of it stems from we don't have natural healthy outlets for our competitive nature. So we have to compete on stuff that's not meant to be competed for, you know, um, So on a daily basis, people are competing over weird stuff and, and they wake up every day thinking how they can be better or outdo or look better rather than how they can help work with work for nobody wants. Nobody has a servant's heart anymore. Nobody wants to serve and collaborate. Um, and I just see how successful everything is when we work together and cooperate and how devastating it is when we don't. And competition is a great thing, but there has to be certain things with competition, there has to be an acknowledged set of rules and acknowledge way to measure who wins and acknowledge start time and end time. So if you wanna have your salespeople compete against each other for sales for one month, that's fine, but you can't create this constantly. You know, this environment, this, this filled with animosity and mist trust. I think that's where it goes too. It's like, cause people mistrust. Like I see people all the time that compete over the weirdest stuff. Like one person doesn't even know they're competing. They don't know when the competition started. They don't know when it ended. They don't know how it scored, but they know they're competing and they don't know how they're gonna win. They just don't wanna lose. And so it's like, it's kind of like moms are horrible, but I see moms shaming so much. It's like one mom doesn't even wanna compete. She don't even know what the rules are, you know? But she feels like she has to compete with all these other moms. Like it's a lack of like natural competitive outlet that we just try to compete with everything else. And, uh, it's just, I, you know, I, every time I write one of these things is something I see that day that inspires me. And I must have seen something that day. It's like, man, why are we competing over this? Um, to get, it gets to me an ugly thing where you start to get disconnected and, uh, alienated from people. I mean, we're supposed to be brothers and sisters too, you know, like, and uh, it's just, it gets to be an ugly world after a while if it's always, you know, you know, second place is the first loser type of world, you know,

Microphone (Scarlett 6i6 USB) - 1: 1:12:23

Yep. You ended that post by saying people aren't bad, people are scared.

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saying true.

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In my last, uh, my last apartment complex in, in, uh, Sacramento, before I moved here, if I was ever getting to the dumpster to take out the trash at the same time as one of my neighbors hitting the mailbox at the same time, crossing paths at somewhere in the complex, I would always try to say hi. And I think one of the, the funnier ones was when me and the one of my neighbors were going into the hallway at the same time and she saw me and she backed up and stepped outta the hallway. So then when we got through, I turned my head to acknowledge her and she was literally walked up to the wall and was holding her laundry basket like this and was staring at the wall. So then I ended up not even greeting her because I didn't want to make her uncomfortable. Yes. Um, why are we scared

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Oh man, that, that is a question right there, Um, it's hard not to be, you know, it's hard not to be afraid. I think we're all damaged. I mean, we have a lifetime of damage from, you know, society and everything else, and we just become scared of, you know, every bad thing is highlighted and people see threats everywhere. Threats to their self-confidence, threats to success. I, I honestly don't know why we're so scared. I can't put it in words, but it's hard not to be scared, you know, cuz we have to, we always feel like we have to protect ourselves after a while, that becomes all consuming to where we don't do good things out of fear for our own safety. We don't even show, you know, gratitude or we don't say we're sorry or admit wrong because we're afraid to be wrong. We're afraid what people will think if we acknowledge that we're wrong. You know, it's, I mean, everybody wonders. What's wrong with the world is we're all so afraid. We see threats everywhere And when we become more isolated, I always say, when you're more f familiar with something, it becomes less scary. If we had dragons in this world and we saw'em every day, we'd be far less scared of dragons. We'd figure out a way to live with'em somehow. right? But you know, you see a dragon one time and all of a sudden it's those scariest and like, it's like Muslims, man. Like people are so afraid of Muslims that have never met a Muslim, you know? But when you work with'em every day, they're just people you know. And like, the most racist people I ever met were people, you know, across the river in Illinois that hadn't seen a black guy in 10 years. And it's like you're afraid of stuff you hate, stuff that you're afraid of, and you're afraid of stuff that you're not familiar with. So if we're insular, and we're closed off, you know? And then plus also people make money out of fear. You gotta understand that people are feeding you stuff to be afraid of because they know that's a way for them to make money and become, if they, somebody can say, you should be afraid of this. Mm-hmm. they're gonna, they know they're gonna make money off of it. So everybody's always pumping you with stuff that you should be afraid of. It can be food, it can be, you know how many posts you see that oatmeal's great? How many posts You see that, hey, oatmeal's killing you don't eat oatmeal. You know, or, you know, the government's trying to do this, or this is doing, and, and some of it may be true, you know, but it's like, man, everybody is telling you something different to be afraid of. Be afraid of yoga. Be afraid of sprinting. Be afraid of lifting weights. Be afraid of black people. Be afraid of, you know, uh, the Brandenburg Conference. I, I don't know. Every, every time I turn around it's like, we need to be afraid of this. It's like, oh my gosh, man. Because love and fear, you know, love and hate aren't opposite, right? We know that it's love and fear to, to love something, you cannot be afraid of it. Um, and I think that's how the devil works evil works through fear. You know, it's like when I see, so that when we see somebody that's mean or angry or spiteful or short, rather than return that with hate, if we can understand that at that person's core, they're afraid, then we look at them differently. We look at, look at them as somebody that we need to understand and comfort rather than return, hate and fear with hate and fear. Um, and that's a hard thing to do. And, and no matter how much you concern for other people's, people are still gonna judge you. They're still gonna be afraid of you. They're still not gonna like you. And we have to be okay with that. We have to be okay with not being liked, but we cannot be okay with not loving other people. Hard thing.

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can't. One of my buddies told me once that it's basically what you just said, but he said, you have to get to a point, David, where you realize that not everyone is going to like you and you are not going to like everyone. And that is a hundred percent a Okay.

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don't have to like people to love him. Nope. Yep.

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And, and one thing too that someone else said to me is, um, and you, you just touched on this too, is we, we look at so many external factors when I'm, I'm, uh, analyzing someone, you know, man, woman, white, black, brown, um, height, age, how they dress. And someone told me once, instead of looking at all these external factors, what if reme, we remembered for a second that both Judd, you, everyone else in Austin, everyone else on this planet, what do we actually have in common? Anxiety, joy, depression, um, trying to find a purpose in life. When you take away those external factors and think about what's up here and what's in here, we're pretty darn

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alike. Yeah.

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alike. And, and I try to remember that when I start judging

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far, when we're alike than we're different. Yes. Yeah. We forget that. Yeah. Forget. Um, there're all afraid of something. We're all, we all, we are all damaged human being. And we look at people and we think they have the perfect life and we don't understand why they're so mean or mean because some, they've been hurt. You know? And I, you know, that's another reason we talk about putting people on pedestals. It's like you can put people on these pedestals or you expecting, then you're gonna be let down and hurt by'em when they let you down. Like, don't expect anything from people. That's not a bad thing. Just don't expect. Love'em, but don't expect a thing from, don't expect them to be. don't expect anything. So when they let you down, you don't, you don't judge them as harshly. Take them for who they are.

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You don't. Yep.

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Yeah. I'm like you we're. I'm not honest all the time. I'm not a great person all the time, you know? But yeah, it's hard to love people sometimes. What I struggle with, you

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I wanna give you a word and when you hear this word, I'd be very curious to hear what your just gut reaction is to it. You ready?

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All right.

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Community,

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Lacking

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Judd, do you think about your community often, often

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My, my, me and my wife. My wife and I both often lack of community, a lack of deep, meaningful relationships, a lack of patience. People don't know what true friendship is. True friendship. We always look at people and how they can serve us in some way, right? How, and it's not just material things like having a boat or something or nice parties. It's like, can they bring me entertainment? Can they bring an outlet? Can they listen to my problems? And when people aren't useful to us, then all of a sudden they cease to speak. Friendship is deeper. Friendship is a connection where you both have sacrificed and been there for each other when it would've been easier not to. That is my definite. There's a lot of people that I like in this world that I get along with. I don't consider them my friends and it's not. It's nothing against them. Friendship, just you have to reach a threshold. Have I been there for that person when it'd be easier for me not to, and have they been there for me when it'd be easier for them not to? There's only four or five people in this whole world that I can say that about, and those are people I trust. And I consider my Fr Cuz friendship is about sacrifice. Community is about being there when it's more convenient not to. And we lack community. We all want to hang out with each other and have a great time. But then when we leave, we talk crap about each other. If you're in a group of people and they're talking crap about somebody else, I guarantee you they're talking crap about you and you leave too, probably. And every time I'm in a group of people and they're talking crap about somebody, I just wanna get outta there as fast as I can. I just can't stand it, you know? Um, there's just no community, no connection. And it's sad. I don't wanna be a negative person, but it's something that we struggle with. You know, it's easier not to have community cause we have all the conveniences. We don't need each other as often as we use. You don't. It's harder to find out who would really be there for you when you needed'em, because it was, our lives are set up in such a convenient, comfortable way that we don't need people on a regular basis. I think there's a reason why God made it. So we need people, so we see who's there for us. Sometimes your curses are your blessings, you

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see people

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I, I didn't want that to turn negative, but you know, like community is something I think I, you know, I think we're missing in

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I think. Yeah, I'm reading a book right now called Platonic and it's a book about, how to make friends And one of the things that she puts put points out that I really like is instead of having the mindset. Why am I not getting invited? Why I'm not part, am I not part of the in group? Why me, me, me. You know? Have you ever flipped the table over and, and done the inviting and done the reaching out? Yeah. And, and done. You know, maybe be the first person to, to make that initiation of new friendship. One of the hardest, but also most interesting and fun things I've been doing in Austin is every day I task myself with meeting somebody new. I try to make it in person most of the time, um, between going to the dog park and going to the gym, and even if it goes nowhere, even if we never see each other again, there's a sense of accomplishment at the end of the day to knowing that I went to the dog park, I met Alan and his dog Jack. We had a very pleasant 25 conversation and 25 minute conversation. Maybe it becomes more, maybe it doesn't, but I think.

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that

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after Covid with how many of us are working from home with how scared all of us are setting up some challenge for yourself. It doesn't have to be as intense as that. Meeting a new person every day is easier said than done. Yeah. I have not been perfect at it, but if I was to pull out my phone and show you a list of notes, cuz my short-term memory is crap. I always counted through it the other day and I met somewhere north of 49 or so people since being here for 88 days. And I think that's been

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That takes effort too though. You know, that takes dedication and effort. That's impressive. Um, you know, also just, even if it doesn't turn a friendship, it's familiarity.

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if, you know,

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you know you're gonna run in these people again sooner or later. And maybe, you know, it's in a confrontational way. But if you're familiar with somebody, you know their name, the result of that will be a much more positive. You know, like in small towns, everybody knows each other's names. Small towns aren't always great either, so, but everybody knows each other's names and like, you're gonna be a lot slower to flip somebody off or honk because you gotta see this person on the supermarket. Yeah. You know, that's Paul and Paul went to middle school with me. I'm not gonna flip Paul off if he cuts me off. Yeah. You know what I mean? It's this an, it's this anonymity, like social media, we can be mean to each other. We can say things we would never say to somebody's face because there's that, there's that sense of anonymity. They might know your name, but they don't know you. Yeah. You know? But we know each other. We're gonna be a lot nicer to each other and we don't know each other.

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It's funny, when I used to work in the gym, I always thought it would be funny when there is a theft in the locker room. Cuz I thought even though we don't know each other, we see each other. And if I stole something from a gym, I would think on my way out. Well never going back there. So either it's someone who was on a guest pass or someone who just like what headspace are you in? If you are planning on

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That's a special kind of person that can steal something from somebody after that lookout every day. Right. How, I mean, I don't understand, like if like as a Joe, I stole Joe's, you know, necklace the other day and I see Joe every single day. I'm like, how, how does that work out in your mind? You know? Yeah. Yeah. That's true too.

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Yeah. Uh, one more post and then one more question as we get to wrapping this thing up. Uh, I'm gonna summarize this one, but you essentially said a compliment is a gift and to learn to accept one. Tell them how much it means to you because in turn it will build them up and show them you value that compliment. I'm personally bad at taking compliments. I freeze up. I don't know what to do with them. And I read that post yesterday morning and on, uh, Thursday or Friday last week, I put a post on my LinkedIn that's the main social media platform on, on, um, just trying to spark, you know, excitement for the, um, for the podcast. And I logged into LinkedIn last night and, uh, someone had put, made a comment of, you know, David, thank you so much. You're an inspiration to us. And I thought of your post, cuz I just read it 10 hours beforehand. So I went in there and I tagged her and I just said, thank you so much. That made my day. And it, it was so easy. Um, how did you learn this very easy path to humility of just simply thanking them and literally telling her what I thought that it, it made my day

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I mean, it's a hard thing to do, man. Um, you know, we're, we're so wired to be humble, to deny compliments that people give us. And we forget that that compliment is coming from someone. People don't have a lot to give you. So when they give you their opinion in a positive. way that might be the only thing they can give you. And it's a valuable thing. Their approval is valuable to them. So they gave you a gift that was valuable to them. And we have to appreciate that gift. And denying that gift is, we think we're being humble, but we're not. We're being rude. And I see it all the time. I see it go back and forth. Like somebody will give somebody a compliment and they'll deny it and then they'll compliment the other person and they'll deny that. It's just, just accept the compliment and return a compliment if it's genuine. Yeah, but don't be, don't feel like you have to return the compliment, you know, because people can tell when you're not genuine and it's not right to them. So if somebody gives you a genuine compliment, say thank you and tell'em what that meant for you. That is showing gratitude. It's hard though, man. Um, cuz we think if we do, then we're not being humble. And we always wanna be humble. And, and more importantly, we wanna be seen as being humble, which is that real humility. If you know you're focused on people thinking you're humble, then humility is a good trait, right? Mm-hmm. So if we're focused on what people think of us, that's not really being humble. you know, like, um, so I just like, people like in this world, they don't have a lot to give you man. So take what they can give you and be what you know, you ever like offer some like I offer to get you coffee and when you accept it excited me cuz I had a small, I couldn't give you anything. So I had a small gift I could give you. When you accepted it, it meant something to me. Yeah. So when you can give somebody a gift and they accept it, it means something to the person giving that gift. Um, I hate it when people don't accept gifts or when they go back and forth and if somebody wants to pay for my dinner, pay for my dinner. Thank you. Yeah. That, that's amazing. Thank you. If they didn't wanna do it, they shouldn't offered. You know, I never asked single person pay for my dinner. If you're gonna offer, I'll take you up on it. Sure. Man. Right. You know what I mean? Like, but then, you know, try to repay them in a certain way maybe. But also, you know, gifts don't always have to be reciprocal. So, you know, people stress themselves out at Christmas because they have to give gifts to everybody cause they know they're gonna give. It doesn't have to be reciprocal, you know, like, you know, it's nice when it is, but it doesn't have to be. You know, um, I think gift giving is a, is a way that people show love. Yeah. You know, accept it, Um, and then like if that person, think of this, if some, that person gives you that compliment and you say, just say thank you and tell them how much that gift that meant to you, that brightens their day and they're much more likely to then go give somebody else a compliment. Cause they get that dopamine return, you know? And so maybe by just saying thank you and, and accepting it, you resulted in four or five other people that day getting a compliment, you know?

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just,

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Hmm. We need to be nice to each other. Yeah. You know, genuinely nice to each other, So anyway, um, I, I don't know, man. It's just, those are my thoughts. I see stuff in the world that bothers me and I just write about it. I don't, I don't know what I saw that day in particular, but, um, you know, it's a hard thing in life to get to an age when you can accept compli. If you're successful and somebody compliments you just take it, man. But you know, you on your end, can't let that get to your head either. You know what I mean? Yes. Like you can't think too good at yourself. Yeah. There's a poem by Ruy Yard Kipling, they called If, and it's one of my all time favorite poems. I have this poem everywhere, and I, Ruy Yard Kipling. He was a, he was a product of the Victorian Age, so he had some racist tendencies and stuff too, man. So he is not a perfect person. But he had an amazing poem and it's a short poem. And I, believe me, I'm not a fan of poetry, but this poem, it's short and it, it's been upward somewhere where I can see it for the last 30 years. And every time a kid is going through struggles, I tell them to take this poem printed out and put it somewhere they can look at it. You know what I mean? And um, you know, he talks in there of like, don't get too high and don't get too low. And success and failure are both imposters, you know, fill every minute with 60 seconds worth of distance run. Those are all quotes from that poem and they stick with me. And it's like, if you do these things, then you'll be a man. Basically, um, I just shared one with the kid the other day that broke his patella at college, you know, and it's like, man, you know, this is adversity. You know, make a heap of all your winnings and risk it on one turn of pitch and toss and start a new at your beginnings and never breathe a word about your loss. You know, like being able to risk everything or be has seen everything you've given your life too broken and stoop and bend them up with worn out tools. It's things like that. Those are those lines from that poem that just stuck with me. You know? Um, don't think you can walk with king's, um, you know, and, and, and not lose your humility, you know, or walk with rabble and not lose your virtue. It's things that, it's like the essence of being a man basically. Um, and part of it is like you don't. Think too much of yourself, you know, don't, don't, you know, like, understand, like there's that balance. Like you don't, you shouldn't talk negative about yourself every day, but don't think you're like the God's gift to everything either. Like understand man, because he will bring you down Trust me, he's done it to me over and over. Every time somebody tells me, like I have big muscles and I think good about something, I turn around and stumble and, or somebody sees my truck or something.

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someone sees my truck. The truck again,

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the truck I, you have nice muscles, but your truck is disgusting. Like, it's like, yeah man. Like we have each have gifts, you know? Mine are easier to see. Some peoples are not, and you have to, and you have to look for those people's gifts, you know what I mean? I don't know where I was going with that. I think it trailed off. But

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all good. Judd, I, you know, for me, I just want to give you a huge thank you for being willing to, you know, on your day off, drive out here.

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Yeah, man. I love that

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with me for an hour and a half longer than that. We've been talking for a while now. Um, I, I, I've learned from you today, um, even just in the last 10 minutes because I openly admitted to you. That's something I wanna work on. How.

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I,

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How do I walk the line of accepting a compliment, not being rude, while also staying humble and not letting it skyrocket to a place where I become cocky, because that compliment. So I'm gonna be thinking about this conversation, and if I do find myself getting cocky, I might even pull up this episode and this little 10 minute segment, and, and listen to it. Try to keep finding that balance. So thank you so much, um, for, for coming out today and for chatting. I did want to ask you, um, to, to wrap this thing up. If someone's thinking about should they train with you or not, you know, where would they find you and maybe what, what question should they ask themselves if you'd be an appropriate coach to potentially reach out to?

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Oh, that's a tough question. I should probably be more prepared to answer this for a business perspective. Sorry. Uh, I work at Acceleration, it's spelled with an X X C E l e r a t i o N. Um, and we focus mainly on, uh, speed training. But I mean, that doesn't mean we're not also fully capable of training. I've trained adults for a year. Um, all of our trainers are very, most of'em have master's degrees and are, are, are very, um, qual high quality trainers that can train any population. Um, so I, I think really, um, they shouldn't, you know, judge a book by its cover. You know, like I know some people see me and I'm in a bodybuilding, so I'm like a bodybuilding looking guy. But, you know, I work with kids and I work with old people. Just cuz I like to be big and muscular doesn't mean that I will insist on you training like a bodybuilder. That I'm gonna listen to you and what you want to do and all the trainers there do this. And we're gonna find a way to train that fits your lifestyle, what you're comfortable with, what you're ready for. Something that we're resulting a positive change in your life. And if you wanna be a bodybuilder, I'll train and be a bodybuilder. Doesn't matter to me. Yep. But you know, it, it's really like, you know, we listen to the client and like what they want to get from training. You're not gonna come in, I'm not gonna tell you what you need. I do have opinions though, as you know, I could talk all day. That's why I'd make the drive. Cause I love listening to myself Talk

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That's awesome.

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Oh that, yeah, that's pretty much it, man. I don't know. I need to work on my business pitch a little bit.

Microphone (Scarlett 6i6 USB) - 1: 1:32:55

Okay, cool. Well, Judd, thank you so much for, for coming on the show today. Um, just everyone who listens to this episode, if you found anything about this that was beneficial for your life, whether it was fitness, Mindset related, military related. We covered so much in the last 90 minutes, but you know, if you found any of these nuggets of wisdom that Jed brought today, you know, please share this episode. Like it, pass it on to a friend, subscribe to the show. Um, you know, this is, this is the exact kind of guests I would love to keep having on us. People who just, they all the cards out on the table are genuine and transparent and add value to this community. Um, so if you like the episode, please share it. Give us some love. Otherwise, I hope that all of you stay healthy and happy. Judd, thank you so much

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much. Yeah, it's great talking,

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really appreciate it. And we will see everyone next Saturday for another episode of David Saturday Night. Sit back until then. Stay well.